A Lions Head

nights like these i miss you, crazy how like nothing and outta no where someone as special as you leaves this earth you leave me behind in this earth full a pain when you were the only one i kept it real with. I miss you i do i miss you so so much and the worst part is i cant tell you i can cry to you i cant hold you i cant love you anymore … here’s the catch i miss “ME” i miss who i used to be ….

i went to the mall to day and i ran into a really hot guy i used to know omg i was just melting the whole time he was selling me some portraits and thats proly why he was like saying sweet things to me lol…but i ended up buying the pictures =( im a sucker for hot guys at the mall god damn he was hot i get to see em again tomrrw when i take the pictures lmao…..im so stupid hahahahastill he made my day i was feeling sad

when i close my eyes my mind flips through pictures of us 5 years together and after all the things i stuck out with you i leave with out you and with a princess in arms and i gave thanks to you for helping me make such a beautiful thing but shes more mine than yours and every knows thats just the way it goes. You dont deserve some one like her and i still miss you after all the bull shit and again these pictures flip through my mind so i close em as long as i can maybe it’ll ease the pain.

                                                                            -Moca   

its kinda like im stuck with you cause no one else will come and find me,

 no one likes me,

no one sees what i have to offer,

 i wanted you to be my everything, for a lifetime you were, but then you pushed me away to a point of no return,

things like that dont come easy to people like me, i tried everything, money, clothes, late nights and more,

 you never could stay, you never could wait for someone like me you never wanted to see, everything i did for you, you had the nerve to put the blame on me,

just know even after all the name calling, face slapping, i look at you like a good man never gonna forget you cause you made me smile, but for you i did everything, you couldnt respect it, you could forget it,

so here i go suit case and all good bye to you, good bye to us cant say im mad that its over….see nothin lasts forever.

I loved you beyond what my parents would say

i loved you beyond my work

I loved you beyond life or death

I loved you beyond money and stress

I loved you regardless….

You had no way of seeing it

 no way of appreciating it

 im still waiting though

through out it all at the end of the day i dont care because all i want from you is a phone call away.

It hurts to know that i put you before my own selfworth you use me for money, drugs, to take you here there and in the end me and you go no where, but even with all that hurt all i expect from you is a phone call away,

 if i do all this for you and you do nothing for me then who is left to like me

Today i was driving, fighting, with him, my man,

i told him crying, screaming, thinking and wishing he could see

 wishing we could be, i told him look at me, think of me, cherish me, hold me, kiss me, be with me,

you’d rather be with them, be with that, holding her, being with her, shes hurting you, killing you, you dont know?

cant you see, your whole world is crumbling, before your eyes our love dies, and all because of you mostly because of her

i wish she could be a girl theres no competing with that one, i cant help you be on one you dont get the same high with me even at your highest with me, theres no beating that little thing, makes you feel like hercules fuck a perk-c